Pagnanais

Desire is “pagnanais” in Filipino. I decided to write the word prompt in my native language.

Ang pagnanais na mahalin ka din ng mahal mo.
Yan ang tangin dasal ko matapos maiwang muli,
masaktan ng paulit-ulit.
Hindi ko alam kung ano ang mali sa akin.
Kung may dapat ba akong baguhin
Kung hindi ba talaga ako madaling mahalin
At ganun na ganun na lang kung ako’y iwan.

Para hindi na masaktan, itinuon ko ang aking lakas at pagnanais
sa ibang bagay.
Pagnanais na makapunta sa ibang lugar, makabisita sa ibang bansa.
Pagnanais na malaman ang iba’t -ibang kultura,
matutunan ang kanilang lengguwahe.
Ibang kasiyahan ang naibigay sa akin.
Mas nakilala ang sarili, mas nabigyan ng halaga.

Sabi ng nanay ko.
Darating ang para sa’yo, maghintay lang.
Sa di inaasahang pagkakataon, dumating sya.
At dahil sa kanya, mas minahal ko ang sarili ko.
Minahal din nya kung sino ako.

Ngayo’y masaya at kuntento na ako.
Natutunan kong magpahalaga ng sarili.
At hindi ko inakalang makikilala ko.
Ang taong walang ibang ninanais kung hindi ako.


For my non-Filipino readers, here’s a translation of my piece.

Desire

The desire to be loved
That’s what I prayed for
after I was heartbroken multiple times.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me
Why is it that easy to leave me
and break my heart?

I decided to travel so I can forget the pain.
The desire to visit a different country.
Learn about about their culture
and learn a new language.
It made me happy.
This experience made me know myself more.
Appreciate and love myself.

My mom gave me this advice:
You’ll meet the one person for you.
And prayers were answered, he came into my life.
Unexpectedly.
Because of him, I’ve learned to love myself more.
He loved me for who I am.

Now I live a happy and contented life.
I wasn’t expecting that through this process.
I’ll meet the one person
Who’s desire is no one else but me.

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